How Many Times They Fall Out Before All The Sparks and Rainbows
by yourknightingale
Summary: These are the times Beca and Chloe thought they could keep their feelings to themselves. PP1-3 (Bonus: Chicago never happened)


Chloe was a senior. That was supposedly her last performance with the Bellas. She was going to graduate and get a job so she could meet more people and forget her 'silly crush' (as Aubrey called it), or love at first right (as Chloe felt it). But, the universe had other plans and those supposes didn't happen.

"Oh, Chloe. Will you be alright?" Aubrey had her wrapped in a tight embrace. "Will this Beca thing be a trouble? As much as first impressions go, you know she didn't fit my taste but I admit, we won. So you have great eyes, you picked the right person. But your heart, bestie. Should I be worried leaving you here in Barden?"

Chloe didn't even get a chance to answer back to anything her bestie had to say about Beca. "I don't know. I'm sure I'll be over it."

Poor Chloe. She tried. When Beca kissed Jesse after the ICCA finals, she was sure she was over her. That was the first time she fell out.

* * *

Beca knew Chloe was a senior. It was just a stupid crush anyway. Like, the girl had to attack her in the shower, invade her personal space, and stand up for her. Those meant nothing. She was going to graduate and forget about her so what was the point?

Jesse was there. So she kissed him.

That was the first time she fell out.

* * *

Chloe dated a few people while in the Bellas house. They were nothing too serious as she was still in focus on winning their A Capella performances every year. And they did win two more times.

But she couldn't help it. She still feel attached to Beca, even though romantically, said girl was in a relationship.

Her feelings for the brunette grew and grew but she stopped right about the time they met Komissar.

It was silly. The German wasn't even a threat but seeing Beca react like that, Chloe thought it was enough.

She was sure she loved Beca but all the built up tension exploded at the retreat.

"So you're just gonna leave now?" She yelled at her.

"We'll have to eventually, Chloe."

Beca was right. It was inevitable.

After that fight, they still managed to save their friendship. Only because Chloe chose to fall out the second time.

* * *

It was hard for Beca to see Chloe be with a few random people. They lived in the same house. All the other Bellas were just there to distract her from her budding feelings for the redhead.

She couldn't be. She had Jesse. It felt like cheating every time she thought of Chloe non-platonically (which she totally did on some sleepless nights).

Beca wasn't even confused. She knew it was there but she really had a boyfriend. So when Komissar entered the scene, she just lost control. All the things she repressed, she blew out towards the German.

She was sure she might have felt more for Chloe compared with the other Bellas. That was why she kept her internship a secret. She was thinking of Chloe.

Jesse knew about this and was even wondering why Chloe didn't. He didn't delve into it though because he was going to LA.

Beca had to let Jesse go.

At the retreat, she remembered saying, "It might as well be now."

She was so stressed that she and Chloe got in a fight. She was just worried about life after the Bellas which was a life without Chloe.

Leaving would have been an option. But she was saved yet again by Chloe.

Beca was afraid so for the second time, she chose to fall out.

* * *

The aca-deities had intervened and Chloe found herself living with Beca in the same apartment after graduation.

They had Fat Amy with them but this meant Chloe had to share a bed with Beca.

So much for falling out.

She was much closer to Beca, in mind and in body. It was very intimate but she didn't want to entertain it. She was sure she was falling more and more in love with her everyday living in that tiny space. But there was still the uncertainty that Beca would even reciprocate. She couldn't risk it.

However, there was an incident where they went home drunk on a Friday night and both girls ended up making out on their bed. It was the months where Fat Amy was constantly disappearing doing who knew what in no one knew where.

"I can't believe this is happening." Chloe panted in between sloppy kisses.

Beca shushed her and just continued holding her face and showering her with pecks and kisses.

Chloe was hoping the next morning that it would start something. She remembered how Beca was the one who pulled her in so many times. Beca was the one who left her lips swollen. Beca was the one who made sure Chloe wouldn't forget how their kiss tasted.

But that night was never brought up. So Chloe, with her heart full of love for her one and only, had no choice but to fall out.

Maybe it just wasn't meant to be.

* * *

Beca knew it wasn't a good idea but she just couldn't pass up the opportunity. So she found herself sharing an apartment with Chloe and Fat Amy.

And she had to share a bed with Chloe which sucked big time because her heart wouldn't stop beating so loud every night. Chloe was intoxicating. It was very hard to concentrate when the woman she'd been harbouring strong feelings for was right beside her, asleep and unaware. She felt so guilty just thinking about how close and intimate they were but like, just as friends. What even was that?

She was in love. There was no denying it. So one night, a few tequilas and alcohol confidence in, she went for it.

"I don't see Amy anymore. We should go home." She grabbed an equally drunk Chloe out of the bar and went straight to their apartment.

Beca remembered initiating it. She was the one who leaned in and captured Chloe's mouth with hers. It was desperate. It was heated. Soon, they were making out and Chloe was talking about how she couldn't believe this was happening.

She couldn't believe it either but lips on lips seemed a greater idea at that moment should one of them decide to stop. No talking needed. Beca didn't want to stop so she kissed Chloe like she missed out on it for years.

She was so in love with her and there was nothing in their way anymore. There was no Jesse. And Chloe wasn't dating anyone. What would stop her from making their relationship a level higher?

The next morning, she chickened out. Chloe didn't bring it up either. So Beca, with her heart stolen and owned by an unsuspecting redhead, had no choice but to fall out.

Maybe it just wasn't meant to be.

* * *

They were invited for a mini-reunion at the Brooklyn aquarium. Chloe was thrilled to be with her ladies again. It was a good distraction like the same kind that helped her during Barden years.

There was something about seeing Emily and the New Bellas perform that made her emotional though. They all looked so young and pretty and would certainly have thriving love lives.

"They all definitely have boyfriends." She cried out while watching them perform.

Chloe had been single for long, it was even news to Aubrey.

"I thought you would have worked it out by now, bestie." The blonde took her aside after their USO plans in the bar. "Beca wasn't supposed to be trouble for you, remember? I thought, at the retreat, it was over. Romantically, I mean. What happened?"

Chloe took a sip from her beer bottle before responding. "You and me both. I thought I was over her, too. I fell out so many times, Aubrey. But I keep coming back to her for some reasons. She's gravity and I have fallen. I'm in love."

"And drunk. You're drunk." Her bestfriend took her drink from her and the Bellas all decide to split and go home. They were about to go on tour so they needed all the rest they could get.

Chloe found herself walking home with Beca. It was a quiet walk with no Amy in sight. The Australian probably hanged out with some other Bellas or had found herself a one-night stand. Either way, Chloe couldn't explain why the silence had made her worry.

* * *

At the Brooklyn aquarium, Beca enjoyed being with her awesome nerds again. Even seeing how Emily handled the New Bellas made her feel a sense of pride inside. It was a bummer that miscommunication made her not show how proud she was.

Not only that, she heard Chloe react to the younger Bellas.

Beca had never made the most confusing look in her entire life and she gave that look to Chloe. The redhead missed it.

She was so confused. Why was she crying? Why was she sad that the New Bellas "definitely have boyfriends"? What did that mean for her? Chloe could get anyone if she wanted. Yet, she didn't even see her date anyone in a while. Why? What was stopping her?

At that moment, Beca saw a slight hint of hope. That maybe Chloe was waiting. She was off the whole time at the bar but she still agreed to the USO tour. Still functioning, she appeared to be. She just didn't realize how her face had shown so much. Before she knew it, she heard Amy whisper beside her.

"I'll give you two some time alone." The Australian didn't even give context whatsoever. She just went her way after saying that.

Beca was thankful for it. She and Chloe went home together and all the while she was thinking so hard on how to approach the subject. She recalled how she believed she fell out for Chloe so many times in the past but there was no hiding it anymore. She was absolutely head over heels for her (but in a very Beca way.)

* * *

The ladies reached their apartment. When the door clicked to a lock, Beca's voice broke the silence in the room.

"Why were you so sad that Emily's crew all have boyfriends?" Beca didn't rehearse that. It just came out since really, she wondered why. "I mean, is that something that bothers you?"

Chloe just froze, her back on Beca. It took her a second to get her words together. "I, uh, I don't know. Seeing them perform earlier just made me feel things. Like you've seen them, right? They were great. I'm sure boys fall for them all the time."

She paused to breathe and continued, "It made me think. Was I even that attractive when we sing and dance? I mean, maybe. But when we're not performing, am I just like nobody? It's also my fault 'cause I'm not looking but must be nice to be wanted from time to time. I don't know. It's silly. I don't even want that. You know what I mean? Like, I didn't know I wanted to be wanted by other people. I don't think I want to be wanted by other people. Maybe I just want to be wanted by one. Or something like that. I don't know. It's weird. I get emotional all the time, you know me."

Beca didn't know how to respond. That was a lot of words. She stepped forward to get closer to Chloe and went back to how she felt that night they made out. Literally, nothing was stopping them from being together. She had to be bold.

"It's funny because I thought I could make you feel better." Well, she could've opened better.

Beca expected Chloe to say, "What do you mean, Beca?" Or, "I don't think so." But that wasn't the case.

Chloe turned to face Beca and she looked her in the eyes. "Maybe you can."

Their gaze lingered. Both fell into a non-spoken mutual understanding. It was like all the things they kept for years were poured out in space and surrounded them.

"I'm sorry I didn't say anything after that night. I guess, I was just not ready enough to be someone who can be with you. You're too precious for me, Chloe." She finally confessed.

Chloe wasn't surprised or shocked. She was expecting this to happen at some point (for years now actually but no matter). She knew there was a reason why she couldn't just stay away from Beca. She knew there was a connection that would explain why even when she tried to ignore her feelings, they kept resurfacing.

She pressed a finger to Beca's lips. "I'm sorry I didn't say anything, too. I could've said I'm only waiting for you." She puts her finger away and giggled. "You have no idea how many times I tried to fall out but I'm just so in love with you, Beca Mitchell."

Poor Beca blushed and stuttered, "D-dude, it's weird hearing you say that like, out loud. I'm not imagining this, am I?"

Chloe quickly closed the gap between them and gave Beca the softest kiss they ever shared. "Nope."

"I-I, gosh, did you just kiss me?" A stunned Beca was a non-functioning Beca but she quickly recovered when Chloe kissed her again. "Okay, that wasn't an accident then. Man, Chloe! You don't know this but I also kinda dismissed the fact that I'm in love with my best friend."

"Why didn't you do anything? I sleep with you every night." Chloe teased.

Beca just shook her head and said, "Honestly? I didn't really think you'd feel the same way."

"I thought the same thing, too." Chloe admitted, taking Beca's hand. "Are we going to forget this in the morning like last time?"

Beca led them both to their beds, "Well, I remember last time we were kinda busy here on the bed. How about we find out again tomorrow?"

Chloe cupped Beca's cheek. "I'm not opposed to that."

* * *

The next morning, Beca was having a cup of coffee in their small kitchen when she heard Chloe say, "Good morning!"

She spun around to see a sleepy Chloe with her disheveled hair and red lips. "Morning! You want some coffee?"

The redhead just sat up. "Did Amy not come home?"

"No, I don't think so." She busied herself by pouring Chloe a cup of hot beverage.

Beca's heart was beating fast. What if last night was forgotten again? They did have a drink and alcohol in their system so it wouldn't be a wonder.

"Beca," Chloe started. Even she was worried about last night's confession but she didn't want to ignore it this time. "About last night," she saw Beca bring the cup of coffee to her lips, "I just want to make it clear that I'm not in love with you anymore."

She saw the brunette froze on the spot and regretted her choice of words. "I- I, sorry, I didn't mean it like that. Sorry, I just woke up from a wonderful night. Thoughts are still foggy."

Beca let out a quiet "Okay".

"I am in love with you. But I think I have been for years. Anyway, please don't freak out but," Chloe smiled at Beca, making this pause for dramatic purposes, "I love you."

"Dude, Chloe," Beca almost dropped the cup. Her shaky hands put it on the table and she walked over to the redhead by the bed, "You almost gave me a heart attack. That was really scary because I love you, too, weirdo."

"Come cuddle!" Chloe pulled her down with her and Beca fell on top.

It took them a while but they both ended up where they should. Maybe it was meant to be.


End file.
